oh these sweet whispers, they are too loud for me

i can’t bear the silence. i feel you move quietly, your muffled words are wind against my face but i just can’t quite seem to catch them. Why is everything out reach, dangled over my head, glinting on the horizon, promised on the dawn? Why does it take so long for you to deliver like you always do? Our clocks obviously don’t match up. Conform to MY standards, you stupid -

creator.

Of the universe.

Maybe I’m wrong.

Maybe you’re the one I should be listening to. Maybe my cries aren’t as important as your screams. If I can’t hear you, whose fault is that?

Mine.

I know. I know. I know more than I want to. Sometimes sweet ignorance blesses me, then people’s voices i don’t understand, advice, reprimands, and the worst, silence. 

God. 

God, you’re cryptic and quiet and stealthy and are you laughing behind my back, or is it a trick of the light?

Are you waiting for me, or have you already left? 

I know I’m taking my own sweet time, lazing over this life I must decide. Which way, how, how soon? 

How soon, my love? 

How soon?